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considering someone's past, whether good or bad - how much does it determines if you'll going to give them a chance at love?
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nkaujhmoob100
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it depends if they tell u or not..if u have to find out on ur own or from others beside them. IF they have nothing to hide they won't mind telling u whether it's good or bad. But also it has to be open minded n understand person to unders tat persons past as well. As they say everyone has a past
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Vash
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From personal experiences, it has yet to affect me. Maybe only because It's never been a serious relationship. But I do believe that if you come up front with it, it can be something of a positive note.
Regardless of good or bad, your past will come into question. Our past truly defines how we grow with time and who we are. You may share experiences now, but ultimately, your past and how you handled it will define what kind of person you are.
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nkaujhmoob100
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From personal experiences, it has yet to affect me. Maybe only because It's never been a serious relationship. But I do believe that if you come up front with it, it can be something of a positive note.
Regardless of good or bad, your past will come into question. Our past truly defines how we grow with time and who we are. You may share experiences now, but ultimately, your past and how you handled it will define what kind of person you are.
yea as i was saying if the person is willing to come up front n tell u about it..which means they have nothing to hide..whether its good or bad. |
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hyaaj
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I have to agree with NH100,
if that person tell you their past are you willing to accept it?
As for me, its thier past, let the past be the past and you be their future.
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gneniam
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Reminded me about this quote which I found somewhere on the net:
“What you need to know about the past is that no matter what has happened, it has all worked together to bring you to this very moment. And this is the moment you can choose to make everything new. Right now.”
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"An invisible red thread connects those destined to meet, regardless of time, place or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle, but never breaks."
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PaPeR_MaKeR
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Eventhough, ppl change whether for good or bad reasons... their still the same person only difference is the way they present themselves!
Oh i forgot to answer the q, it would depend... if i really like her, I just might but ppl rarely change, like i said they only change the way they present themselves. Their personality will be the same cuz thats who they are and that wat makes them special/different/unique in their own ways whether its good or bad.
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«Last Edit: February 05, 2010, 08:32:41 PM by PaPeR_MaKeR»
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i is vety velly old.... i is already 22.... so yea, im looking for some1...hehehe
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glam_k
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To people who lie about their past or had something to hide, I'll just have to pass. If you truly care for someone or like someone, be open and be able to accept what other people say, either good or bad. The past is in the past, don't hold it against anyone. Accept them and get to know them regardless of what happen before you met them. And to the person with the past, no matter how bad the situation was in the past, there's no need to hide anything. Sooner or later, they'll know anyway so why not tell them straight out and get it over with? Who care if they look down on you or decide not to speak to you ever again, being honest and open minded make you the better person.
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mozemoua
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Everyone has a past, but their actions from their past will determind their future! If he is truthful and isn't afraid to hide it from me, then he'll get a better chance, but if I was to heard it through the grape vine then it'll be another story, and also it depends on how bad that "past" is, if it'll hurt my relationship I'll have to think twice. Yes people makes mistakes, but the question is, had he learned from it?
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I want to fly like a bird so that I can be free and see all the beauty of this earth...
check out my blog at---> mozemoua.com
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chocoheart
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well..it really depends on the person's personality, trustworthy, etc...For myself: whats the point of giving him or her another chance when you know he or she is gonna make the same mistake...like what my dad always tell us..."the same person will always be or act the same no matter what." But what really matters is what that person do to you that have hurts you..but if you're the one that hurts him or her...then its going to be a 50/50 chances...they will either let it go and forgive you or hate you...so it depends on how you personally feels of that person..do you think he or she deserve to be given another chance???
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NkaujYeeb
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i think people say they dont care.....or can love with it.......but I dont think so....
I think people's past would effect me in some kind of way....maybe not a lot but a little....
for example.....if a guy u met....used to be a man who sleeps around with random girls from the club...and parties every weekend...and now claims that he is mature and has stopped those childish acts....and now whats to start a serious relationship with u.......unless u were in the same kind of situation like him....i think it would definitely make u stop and think "will he actually be serious with me?" or "damn....how many people has he been with ?...does he have hiv?"...hahhaha.......
just a silly example..but
I think the past will matter to me......it would probably be like 30-40% in consideration when im thinking about whether to give u achance to love or not...
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«Last Edit: February 06, 2010, 10:50:20 AM by NkaujYeeb»
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is finally free!!!!
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FRESH
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yeeb, you really hit the spot!  ... why so little of a chance you'll give him - why can't that situation be trusted and see what he does? |
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fishin715
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i thing that when giving a person a chance with love, people shouldn't consider someone's past too much. i think it's up to the other person to tell you if they want to. if you ask and they do tell you, then it's okay. but it is disrespectful i think to ask them for their past. maybe that person doesn't want to talk about their past. maybe they moved on. i think if you had to even question a person about their past, then that person is certainly not for you. i think people should focus on the future and see whats ahead for them instead of dreading on what has happened in the past. for example a girl can be slutty and a man can be a man whore but maybe later on in life, they become great daddys and great mommys. just because a person sleeps around when they were younger, doesn't mean they are a bad person. maybe they were just too young to realize what they did was wrong or like how others say "they couldn't help it, they are just great at having sex". who knows. but don't punish them because they made some great decisions. love is much deeper then that. i think people always see the way of a good partner as being good person. for example, a man/woman who doesn't sleep around is a better partner or parent. this isn't always true. so be careful what you wish for. all i am saying is that people shouldn't be so picky. there is a good thing in every person.
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PaPeR_MaKeR
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^ Good point, man i wish i had slept with all the girls i could had when i was younger and now too...DAMN.... if only i can relive my life all over again, i would had slept with a new chick everyday...cuz i know later on i can change... hehehe... cuz right now im not that dude who sleeps around at all |
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«Last Edit: February 07, 2010, 02:03:51 PM by PaPeR_MaKeR»
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i is vety velly old.... i is already 22.... so yea, im looking for some1...hehehe
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kou102
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Yes it's great that both parties don't have anything to hide by
telling their past to each other, but how bad is each of their past?
It all depends how bad they were in their past. Yes it's their past
and they should look in the future but past historys does haunt
you forever depending on how severe it was. and yes it's great
that they have nothing to hide by telling eachother their past
no matter how bad it is but you just have to make your best judgement
depending.
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